Be safe out there

I went to court today to be a witness in my stalking case. It was very surreal.

When I walked into the nondescript building on the side of a nondescript road, I walked into a nondescript room buzzing with people from all walks of life.

I don’t know much about the operations of the justice system, but throughout the hour I sat there, I came to realize that all cases heard in this tiny courtroom were criminal. There was the mother-daughter team caught stealing from a department store, a guy accused of harassment who had to turn over a computer card filled with photos, a woman who sat waiting for her friend to get out on bail, and plenty of lawyers wheeling suitcases, meeting their clients for the first time.

Oh, and the place was littered with police officers, security guards, constables, troopers.

It took me a while to get over the feeling that I had been dropped there from outer space. And once I almost got over it, a door opened, and a man in shackles came out and passed through the room very close to me. And later another. Then another. And another.

I thought of “Silence of the Lambs,” when Jodie Foster’s character goes down the row of cells and is leered at and spit on. Only…. there were no bars between me and these guys. And it’s not often that I’m the most attractive girl in the room. Not often at all.

And then one of the guys who was previously shackled came out and sat down, sans chains and handcuffs. OK, someone thought that was a good idea, but couldn’t they let him go out the back door??

Be careful who you date. Mac seemed very normal when I first started emailing him, and even after a few dates. It wasn’t until I gave him the “I would like to pursue another relationship” spiel that he started — for months on end — relentlessly contacting me through every means possible.

His lawyer’s defense? He said, chuckling: “This guy’s in love with you.”

I don’t think it’s so funny. Not when law enforcement must get involved.

Rut? What rut?

OK, I know I’ve been lamenting a little about being stuck with having Marc come over every other night. But we have been talking more about things…

He broke up with his girlfriend the other day, and when he asked to come over, I thought, oh no…

I guess it was a little egotistical to think it had anything at all to do with me. But then he let loose about this cute little crush he has on some woman at church. “You know how you get butterflies when a certain person walks in the room?”

So we talked at length about what we wanted from each other, and that neither one of us would be hurt when one of us had to walk away. So, now that the pressure and expectations — if there were any — have been cleared up, I have to say, the sex is even better! We didn’t even have sex that night. We were just pals.

Last night, though, I must have had four really good orgasms. And as he was dressing to go, he decided to take another turn at it. It was unbelievable.

And quite possibly, exactly what I need right now. The quest for love can go on, and I’m not a horndog looking to jump into bed and screw up the next relationship!

God, this must be what it feels like to be a man, LOL.

I was quite tempted, in a moment of complete immaturity, to text my recent ex last night: “I just had the most incredible sex. Why couldn’t YOU do that?”

It helps that I’m getting along great with Tony too. I have yet to meet him, but our emails are kick-ass and I think I’m ready.

The ego — and the libido — are satisfied for now.

Everyone is doing it!

I’ve been surfing around other blogs that address online dating, and I noticed a recurring theme: Match.com seems to be the medium of choice.

I was using a less restrictive — FREE — service, but I decided to check out Match. And I ended up signing up. Two days later, someone is asking for a date!! Holy shit, who knew on Tuesday I might have a date on Friday?

I don’t like working this fast though… the other service kind of forced you to take your time, email, find out stuff you wanted to know. I’m not so sure I want to agree to a date based on some bubble form someone filled out.

Funny thing though… I discovered my recent ex is listed on Match. The same ex that I tell everyone was the love of my life, but we had to split up because he said his children weren’t ready for him to date. A friend asked me if maybe that was an old profile from before he started seeing me. Could be…. but he’s updated it with photos he took while in a relationship with me. Particularly a cropped version of a phone pic he sent me before he got in the shower one morning. To which I responded with a good boob shot.

That kinda hurt.

Sooooo….. I called him. Because I’m masochistic like that. What’s up? I see you’re ready to date after all!

And he told me, “I just never really loved you.”

Ooooh, that kinda hurt too. Considering he told me over and over that he was waiting for me all his life and was going to get me a ring for Christmas.

It was a blow, and I’m not sure if I had been any more cautious about dating via the internet that I could have prevented it. I am going to keep things in perspective, keep on keeping on.

Weekend blahs

I thought about going out Friday, or Saturday, or Sunday… but I got home from work Friday and just got on a cleaning kick. There was really no activity on the front of online dating, and as I recall from my last experience with it, weekends are slow as far as communication.

I did IM with Marc some more Friday night, while he was on shift. It was pleasant and interesting, but nothing too startling. I think I could see myself being friends with him. Easily. But not dating him.

While I was IMing him, my most recent ex cut in… “If you want to meet for dinner here and there, that would be great.”

And it was like… a tailspin. A guy I REALLY got a kick out of dumped me, and now he’s inviting me back in on a limited basis.

But I’ve recovered from it, thank goodness. Got my wits back about me. I’m not going to be a booty call. Even if he buys me dinner “here and there.”